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1. An introduction must state your side and summarise reasons
‘I think X is better than Y because of reason a) reason b) and reason c)’
There is NOTHING in the NAPLAN guidelines that dictates this. It is formulaic writing and will not get strong marks.
Trust me on this, NAPLAN markers turn up to our seminars regularly (they want to know what we are doing right) and they all say the same thing. The introduction should immediately ‘engage’ the reader.
2. You can’t use narrative in persuasive
Oh yes you can! For instance there are 6 marks (out of 48) just for ‘engaging the audience’. Look at the NAP website and see the sample marking of a child’s wonderful introduction called: The Lion’s Glorious Hair. (Pages 62–5)
Here is the comment from the marker: ‘Opens strongly by using narrative to engage reader, illustrate point and set up context’.
Yes, narrative is definitely encouraged…and rewarded.
3. There is no place for dialogue in persuasive writing
Dialogue is an extremely powerful persuasive tool and it also adds vibrancy to writing. Here’s a simple example.
‘It’s not fair, why should I have to unpack the dishwasher!’ In every household with children these words are wailed often. Should children do household chores? Yes, definitely yes. Any child over six years of age can carry a plate to the table. So why can’t they carry a few plates to the cupboard as well?’
4. Be reasonable, not emotional
Wrong! Reasonable, cool, calm does not persuade. Appealing to the reader’s emotions is far more effective.
‘It is cold and it is dark and it is two hours until morning. Michael Malvern is walking, walking, though the empty park limping a little on his aching feet. Two years ago, Michael was a bank teller, he had a wife, a home and three happy children. Then came the onset of depression, the financial problems and finally the divorce.’
5. You must state the facts. You can’t use Show, don’t Tell
Painting word pictures is a fantastic persuasive device. This is far more convincing than facts alone, e.g. For the topic ‘Chocolate is better than ice-cream’:
‘It’s a hot day, a little kid is screaming and his mum is frantic. She’s just paid $5 for an ice-cream, but the kid’s tongue is too small and the ice-cream melted too fast. Four licks, a slurp and… plop, the ice-cream slipped off the cone and onto the floor. The older sister was smarter, she chose a chocolate bar. She holds it safely in her hand, looks at her brother and calmly takes another bite.’
6. Persuasion is serious business. Humour should be avoided
We laugh and learn at the same time – and of course that makes us want to read more. For example:
‘Are dogs smarter than cats? Oh purrrrlease. Let me ask you this question. Would you ever be able to persuade eight cats to pull a heavy sled and a couple of men through a snowstorm? I don’t think so. Though it does appear to be easy to find eight dogs to do this.”
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